For Better Or For Worse
by iheartv
Summary: Kathy died, Elliot's mad, Olivia is a mess and when a bad turns into to something amazing, you can never stop believing in miracles.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

Five years. It's been five years since the death of Kathy Stabler and the birth of Eli Stabler, the youngest of the Stabler children. A lot has changed in five years for Olivia Benson. About three and a half years ago she quite SVU, and now works as a teacher at the academy, only a few times a week. She also got the thing she wanted the most; she got a wonderful three year old daughter named Eleanor. Eleanor Megan Cristina Benson. In those five years the only Stabler that called and kept in touch with her was Maureen, the eldest Stabler child. They had become great friends and she was with her all through Olivia's pregnancy, and for the last five years Olivia was there for her on this horrible day. But today, today was different because Maureen asked if she could bring some people over to do the little tradition they did every year. They would eat ice cream and watch movies, then Eleanor would fall asleep, Maureen would then wake up in the middle of the night with a nightmare, Olivia would comfort her and then Maureen would be back asleep. Once Maureen was asleep for the second time, she would go to bed and every year in the morning, Maureen would have to wake Olivia up from a nightmare. This had just become a routine over the years. Olivia was not expecting that a horrible day could bring so much joy.


	2. Chapter 1

_**Okay... so my goal was to update every week, but that ain't happening. I'll try, but my teacher decide it would be a good idea to give us a project or an assigment in every calss durning exam times... so I knida been busy. We went on a grade 9 trip like two weeks ago and it was a 12 hour drive and my freind for like 2 of them read and edited my story...she is my BETA...thanks EC! OKAY no that the boring stuff is over lets dive into another EO story!**_

**Chapter 1**

"Come on, dad."

"No, we are spending it this year as a family," Elliot said to his older daughter, Mureen.

"I go every year, why is this year different?" She questioned her father.

"Beacuse it's been five years since your mother's death and it's your brother's birthday," he insisted.

"We can all go, as a family. Please, she has been there for me."

"Fine. Only if its okay with your siblings." He looked at Mureen, and when he saw that she had thge biggest smile on her face, he couldn't help but smile back. "KIDS!" Elliot yelled "COME DOWN HERE!"

Dickie, Lizzie, Kathleen and Eli came running down the stairs. When they got to the bottom Dickie asked "hey what up?"

Elliot looked at Mureen signingling her that she had to ask. She looked at her siblings and then said "you know how every year I go out after we get home from mom's grave and we had birthday supper for Eli." She paused and looked at her younger siblings and they nodded. "I was wondering if you guys want to come with me this year."

It was slient as the children looked at each other. Kathleen was the first one to speak. "What would we do there?"

"We usally eat ice cream and watch movies or play board games. She has a little three year old, I babysit her sometimes. Its really fun, please come." Mureen pleaded.

Once agian it fell into a slience.

"I'm in." Lizzie said aimably.

"It sounds fun," Dickie agreed.

"YAY! ROADTRIP!" Eli screamed making evreybody laugh.

Everybody looked at Kathleen who had yet to answer, and on cue they all gave her a pleading look to say yes. Kathleen opened her mouth to say something but closed it agian and waited a moment. Finally she opened her mouth again and said "I will only go if you answer this question." She looked at Mureen. When her sister noddded in encouragment, Kathleen continued. "Is the baby cute?"

Mureen couldn't help but smile. "Yes, very- but don't call her a baby. She flips out if you do."

"Come on kids, let's go. Mureen, you're driving." Elliot said while he threw the car keys at her. Mureen caught them and they head out to go meet Mureen's mystery friend for the first time. Or so they thought.


	3. Chapter 2

_**Okay here is another chapter! I hope that you are enjoyin reading this as much as I am enjoying writing it. I was told that I have spelt Mureen's name wrong, but since I started like Mureen, im going to stick with it. One more thing...if you know of any good fanfics please comment the names of them! Thanks!**_

_**-chelsea22dunn**_

**Chapter 2**

The Stabler family arrived at a nice Manatthen apartment. They all exited the car and headed to the door of the building. The doors was open by an older man that reconized Mureen instanly. "Good day Mureen." Mureen smiled as the entered the in the buliding. The kids were in awe of the fancy upper class buliding. They went to the elevator and Eli insisted that he pushed the button to head up. The elevator dinged insistantly, indacating that it had arrived. They got in and Mureen pushed the fifth floor button. The door closed and the elevator began to move toward the the correct floor. The elevator dinged as it reached its destination. The family got off and headed towards Murren's friend's apartment; apartment 5E. When they approched the door, Eli wanted to knock but Mureen pulledd out a key and unlocked the door.

They enetered the apartment, and the first thing they heard was a female voice yell "Ellie! Get your butt right here now!"

A small girl not much shorter then Eli came running out in her diaper giggling.  
"When your ready come and get it! Na na na na!" The small girl shouted back and right to Mureen "SAVE ME MO!" Mureeen picked up the little girl and held her tight. When who they assumed had been shouting to the little girl came out wearing tight leggings and a tight purple tank top, she was holding a pair of hot pink leggings. She didn't notice the other people in the room and went straight to Mureen and started tickling the little girl in her arms. The little girl burst out laughing and Mureen put her down.

"Pants. On. Now." The woman said and the little girl agrred.

"Liv," Mureen said trying to get the woman's attention. It worked. "You remember my family." The woman looked up smiling, but it fell when she reconized the people Mureen had brought into her home.

"Olivia," Elliot gasped in bewilderment.

"Mureen, please take Eleanor and your family and go sit in the living room." Olivia handed Ellie to Mureen before ghosting into her room. She closed the door and sunk down on the other side of it and cried. "Why is he here? He hasn't talked to me in five years, why now?" She wispered to herself.

Meanwhile in the living room Eli and Eleanor were playing on the ground with the toys Mureen had brought out. The other kids were talking among themselves and Elliot was wandering around looking at all the pictures she had around the house. Some of Olivia, some with Eleanor, Alex, Casey; the old team. There were two other people he didn't reconize and himself. A picture they took almost six years ago- he rememberd clearlywhy she was smiling so big-they were at a retriment party for some guy they barely knew and they were talking. Earlier that day they had had a hard case-it was difficult for both of them but more so Olivia. Elliot decided to try to lighten up the mood by telling her a cheesey joke that always made her laugh. He didnt know who took this picture, but he had loved it. The small smile that had drifted onto his lips from the memory was sure proof of that.

When almost a half hour had gone by and Olivia still hadn't emerged from the room. Elliot decided to go see if she was okay. He walked up to the door and gently tapped on it. "Liv?" He waited a moment and there was no answer, but he could hear someone crying. He tried the doorknob and it was unlocked; he slowely opend the door to find her in the corner in tears. Without a second thought, he instantly rushed over to her. The fast movement scared her and she let out a loud scream.

The kids heard it in the living room. Murreen had heard that scream before. She instructed her siblings to watch the younger children and rushed to the master bedroom to find a stunned Elliot and a crying Olivia. "Dad, just back away slowly. I'll calm her down." Elliot obliged and slowly took three steps back, not wanting to go any farther and not having a clue to what was going on with his strong, fearless, brave Olivia. Murren slowly approched Olivia and tried to calm her down. "It's okay Olivia, he isn't here. You're at home, he can't hurt you agian." Olivia was calming down a little as Mureen kept whispering encouraging things like "it's okay" and "he's not here". After about five minutes of that Olivia had calmed down enough to actually talk. She was extremely embarssed that Elliot had seen her break down like that; the last time he saw her in a state like that was five years ago.

Elliot approched the girls and slowly knelt down in fornt of Liv and looked directly into her eyes. He told Murreen to leave without taking his eyes of Olivia. Olivia had her kness pulled up to her chest and her head knelt down upon them. Elliot decided that the best course of action would probably be to alert Olivia as to what he was going to do before he did it- the last time he had made a movement she didn't know and it had made her freak out. "Liv, I'm going to lift your face off your knees beacuse I want to see that buetiful face of yours." She nodded and he gently put his hands on bothe cheeks and brought her head up so he could look in to her eyes. He used the pad of his thumbs to wipe away the tears, like he did the last time he seen her cry. "What happend to you Liv? Please tell me."

He wanted to encourge her to talk about what had happend- but instead he got a snide remark from her. "What happened to me? Like you really care. You left Elliot. You just left and never tried to contact me agian. I had to find out from Cragen that you handed in your papers. I called and texted for months, and I didn't even get a reply. Fin, Munch, Cragen, Melinda and Alex had to deal with a cranky pissed of Olivia for weeks. I cried myself to sleep for three weeks, everynight finding a new way to bame myself for losing you, for distroying your family. Beacasue everything that happened to you is my fault- _it's always my fault!" _She eneded he speech with a few more tears.

Elliot looked at her, flabbergasted and floored that she blamed herself for what happend-he _had_ blamed her for a little while, that much was true- but he had eventualy came to his senses and decided it had not been worth it. "It's not your falut. Kathy's death was an accident, the time I got shot or when Stucky kidnapped me wasn't your fault- it was mine, all mine. All the times you got hurt was my fault too- I didn't have your back." Elliot looked at her and cupped her face like he did so long ago and continued. "I _have_ never lied to you, and I _will_ never lie to you. Yeah, I blammed you for Kathy's death. But I came to my senses and realized that, if anything, it was _my _falut." He was now crying too, small tears forming and pooling in his deep blue eyes and thretening to spill onto his cheeks. "I couldn't tell you in person becasue I felt so bad for yelling at you that night and blamming you. To be honest, Liv, I thought you would hate me."

"I could never hate you. Even when you pissed me off so much, I could never hate you." She wispered the words ernestly, her voice still horse form crying. She opened her mouth like she was going to say something but closed it agian.

It didn't go unnoticed by Elliot and he said "Liv, what is it? Just tell me."

She looked direltly into his eyes and blurted out "I love you


	4. Chapter 3

**For those few people that aree actually reading this story...thank you! For those people that keep commenting on my poor spelling, I know I cant spell...but hey I'M trying here! If you like this story please review!**

**Chapter 3**

Elliot looked at Olivia like she had three heads. Her words shocked him through and through, freezing the tears in his eyes. Olivia immediately got self consious and proceeded to do what she felt was the most logical couse of action-she pulled Elliot's hands from her face, got up, and ran to the bath room.

_'What did I do?' _Olivia thought to her self. More tears appred at the back of her eyes. She tried to hold them back but it failed. She hated to be so vulnerable and weak. She stopped crying and cleaned up her face so she looked presentable and left the bathroom, trying to at least look calmer than she felt. She didn't even acknowledge that Elliot hadn't moved from the spot; she just looked past him, trying to calm the torrent of emotion welling inside of her. She walked out into the living room and was bombared with a hug from her little girl.

"MOOMMY!" The little girl squealed as she jumped into her mom's arms.

"Hey babygirl!" Olivia crowed as she picked up her three year old daughter Eleanor.

"I ain't no baby!" Elenor protested, crossing her arms and giving the cutest angry face.

"No, you aren't. But you will always be my baby," Olivia declared, before kissing the little giirl in her arms head.

Elliot was still in the room thinking how exited he was because she loved him too. He had loved her for years -yet he had never had the corage to tell her_. 'I pushed her away beacsue sometghing tragic happened and I balmed her_.' he thought to himself. _'I waited too long. She probaly found someone else. Someone who stuck around-unlike me. At least, they stuck around long enough to give her that little bundle of joy. How could I be so stupid?' _Elliot was so angry at himself-and when he got angry he had to vent. Instead of punching a perp or a wall he raced out, determined to finaly tell her how he felt.

He raced out of the room and straight to where Olivia was holding Eleanor. He took Eleanor from Olivia's arms and put her gently on the ground. Before Olivia could say anything Elliots soft lips that she had stared at so many times before where on hers. They both drifted off to another world of pure joy and happniess, losing themselves in the bliss of the kiss they had both secretly wanted for so long. They didn't came back from this world of joy until Dickie decided to be inmature and made a fake pucking noise. "El," Olivia said once they broke apart. Reality began to seep back to her, and she had no clue where this came from or what was going to happen now.

"Liv, I love you to. I have for years, when me and Kathy spilt up the first time and realized my feelings for you. Kathy and I got back togther...but those feelings never left. When she died, I blamed you because I was with the woman I actually love. I NEEDED to make sure you were safe. I'm so sorry that I pushed you away. Can we maybe try to be a couple?" Elliot cut her off.

She just stared into his beautiful blue orbs and could see he actually meant it and it wasnt just beacuse she said it first. "Yeah, yeah we can." Olvia stated and Elliot got is signature Stabler grin. "But on one condition," she added. She looked at the six childrens faces. "As long as it is okay with the kids."

Elliot turned towards the children giving them a look asking for them to give Olivia and himself their opinion. The kids all looked stunned for a few moments. Then the signature Stabler grin moved across the four older Stablers- Eleanor and Eli didn't understand what was going on. Mureen walk over to the two younger children and knelt down to their level and said "mommy," she pointerd to Eleanor "and daddy," she pointed at Eli then contunied talking with her hands on her lap "are wondering if its okay with us if they date, or become girlfreind and boyfreind. Is that okay with you guys?"

Eli understood what they wanted, so he shook his head vigorously, but Ellie had no clue what was going on so she just ran up to Olivia with a giant grin and crowed "YAY?" in a questioning tone. "Moommy happy?" she asked Olivia as she picked her up.

Olivia gazed adoringly at her little girl in her arms and said "mommy is alwasy happy with you around, but I'm wondering... are you happy?"

Ellie looked at her for a moment and then screamed "clap along if you feel like a room without a roof, because I'm happy." She giggled and started clapping.

Elliot looked at Olivia wondering what that meant. Olivias caught the look and explained "she likes to quote song lyrics. That one is from the song _Happy_, therefore she is happy." She gave him a giant smile and Elliot leaned down and kissed her; this time it was Ellie's turn to shout "icky!" and they all burst out laughing. "Ellie how about you go pick out a movie, but not Frozen." Olivia put Eleanor down she ran to the movie rack. "Mureen, you and I can go get the ice cream and the rest of the Stabler clan can go sit in the living room." They all followed Oliva's directions.

He love her for years and never had the corage to tell her. 'I pushed her away beacsue sometghing tragic happened and i balmed her.' gh ethought to himself. 'I waited to long, she probaly found someone else. How could i be so stupid?' Elliot was no angry at himself, and when he got angry he had to vent it. instead of punching a perp or a wall he raced out detrimined to she her how he felt.

Olivia and Mureen wentr to the kitchen and as soon as they entered Olivia embraced Mureen because when Olivia and Elliot were asking the children about there no annonced love for each other, Olivia noticed a look in Mureens eyes t5hat she sees everyear. Mureen tryed to hold back the tears, but falied miserbly. She sobbed into Olivias shoulder. "I want my mom back. I miss her so much, I miss being a family." Mureen said inbetween sobs.

The last part of that sentence broke Olivias heart, _'maybe this reltionship with Elliot is a bad idea.' _ she thought. Olivia pushed that thought to the back of her mind and pushed the thought that she had to calm Mureen down. Olivia whispered calming things like "It's okay" and "Your okay". Olvia didnt relize that she wass now crying to, that thought she pushed to the back of her mind came back and she felt to bad because she was trying to calm Mureen down but think so shelfish thoughts.

Meanwhile in the living room Ellie finally chose a movie. She brought it over to Elliot shouted "MARY POOPINS! MARY POOPINS!" Elliot took the movie and went over to the DVD player and put the movie in and turned on the TV. On his way back to the couch he grabedd the remote adn sat down on the right side of the couch. Dickie was on the ground with Eli, Lizzie and Kathleen were sitting on the love seat in a deep coverssation, he couldnt hear what it was aboaut, but he assumed it was about the kiss that just happened. He rembered the kiss, the place the kiss toook him, the amount of sparks that flew during that kiss. Elliot doent belive in magic, but the kiss he just shared with Olivia was magicaly. He was so lost in thought he didnt even notice that Eleanor came and climbed on his lap.

As soon as the movie started Olivia and Mureen exited the kitchen and entered the living room with six different flavores of ice cream in small tubs and eight spoons. Olivia handed out the ice cream as Mureen gave out the spoons. Olivia sat on the couch next to Elliot and Ellie and Mureen sat on the other side of Olivia and cuddled into her side like she did everyyear. Olivia insinclty wraped her arm around her pulling her closer in the procces. Elliot put his arm around both Olivia and Mureen and pulled them closer to his body.

Once it was over Olivia picked up a asleep Eleanor for Elliots lap and carried her to her light pink bedroom, once Olivia enterd the bedroom she walked over to the white crib and gently laid her in it. She closed the door and hheaded back to the living room. "It's late, why dont you guys just stay the night?" Olivia asked the Stablers.

Elliot looked at his kids and said "where would we sleep, because I dont think we can all fit in the living room.

Olivia rolled her eyes and she openmed her mouth to speak but Mureen cut her off "Eli could sleep on the blow up bed in Ellies room, Kathleen and Lizze could stay in the spare bedroom, Dickie and dad could stayout here in the living room, and I could sleep in Olivias room, like I do every year. Kathleen and Lizzie I have a couple pairs pj's here you can borrow, and I know Liv has HUGE sweatpants that would probaly fit the Dickie and dad. Is that okay with you Liv?"

"Yes, of coarse, and my sweatpants would fit you guys." Olivia answered.

"Kids?" Elliot looked around the room at his kids tired faces. The nodded in agreement. "Are you sure Liv, we don't want to over stay our welcome?"

"You guys are like my family besides the team, you can never, and I mean never over stay your welcome. Okay?" They nodded in unnderstandment. "Okay, l'll go grab the clothes, I might have a t-shirt for Eli to sleep in. Ill be back."

Olivia went into the room and Elliot turned to his kids when he knew Olivia could'nt hear him "are you guys sure you are okay with Liv and I dating?"

"We are but, but im afraid she is going to replace mom." Kathleen said looking down at her feet.

Nobody noticed that Olivia came back. "I would never replace your mom, if you aren't comfortable with this we won't date, but im not trying to replace your mom, I promise." She said in a sincer voice, the one she used to do with victoms.

"Even if it makes you unhappy?" Kathleen asked.

"Yes." Olivia said without even thinkiing about it. "You are more important to me then my happiness.

Kathleen ran over to her and wrapped her arms around her neck. " I just miss her so much. I miss having someone to girl talk with, one that isnt my sister. I miss the motherly advice. I want my mommy back." Kathleen sobed into Olivias shoulder like Mureen did only a few hours earlier.

Olivia wraped her arms around her and whispered into her ear "sweetie, I wish I could take all your pain away and bring back your mother. But, I can't. The most I can do is try to help you, and be there for you. Anything you need or want me to do, I'll do everything in my power to do it for you. Okay?" Kathlenn nodded and wraped her arms tighter around Olivias neck. Elliot just stood there with a sad smile on her face.

After a few moment Kathleen pulled away and wiped the tears off her face and Olivia handed out the clotthes and told them where the bathroom was. The kids went to get chnged and went to bed. Both Olivia and Elliot could'nt sleep, they had to much on there mind.


	5. Chapter 4

_**Sorry for the late update...i have been busy with being lazy. But ill try to update more! And if anyone knows any good fanfics pls review! Hope this chapter makes up for my bad updating.**_

**Chapter 4**

The Benson household with her favorite Stabler's was quiet. Everyone was asleep; except for Olivia. Every year Maureen would wake up crying or screaming from having a bad dream. After two years of this she decided that she would not sleep until Maureen has her nightmare. It was almost two in the morning and Maureen had yet woken up. Olivia was just about to fall asleep when the tossing and turning began. Olivia shook Maureen a little and said her name to try and wake her up- after about the millionth time she did, and Maureen automatically clung onto Olivia like her life depended on it. Olivia just held the girl, and once the crying subsided she laid down, with the girl still in her arms. The drifted off to sleep together.

Olivia didn't notice when Maureen got out of bed. The other Stabler's were also waking up too. They all entered the kitchen and Elliot asked "morning Mo, where's Liv?"

Maureen looked up at her father and said, "she should be awake in about 5 minutes."

Elliot looked confused, then all of the sudden a loud scream came from the master bedroom. This caused Elliot to have a look of horror on his face. Maureen ran into the room like she has done so many times before and tried to wake Olivia up. She had no luck. Maureen could tell she was sinking deeper and deeper into her nightmare, so she got worried and called for her dad. He came running in to see her daughter in tears and Olivia rolling around with sweat on her forehead and tears running down her face. "Dad please help wake her up! I can usually wake her up, but I can't today, I'm really worried!" Maureen cried to her father.

"NO! NO! NO!" Olivia screamed. "Stop. Please no,' she cried. Now Olivia was sobbing in her sleep.

Elliot took her by her shoulders and shook her while whispering "wake up Liv." They kept shaking until her eyes shot open. It took her a minute to realize who was in front of her, but once she noticed she wrapped him in her arms and sobbed into his shoulder. Elliot immediately wrapped his strong arms around her and pulled himself up on the bed and held her close to his chest. He looked at Maureen and she left the room with tears in her eyes. Elliot whispered things in her ear like "it's okay baby" and "you're safe" and "no one can hurt you." _ 'What happened to my strong Olivia?' _Elliot thought to himself.

They sat like that for what felt like hours- but it had only been a few minutes- Olivia lifted her head and whispered "thank you."

He debated whether to ask about her nightmare, but he decide not to. Instead he asked "are you okay?"

She shook her head and said "no," Olivia looked down and continued "but I have to be, for my little girl."

"Why did you get the name Eleanor?" Elliot looked at her as she blushed and looked at her hands. Elliot lifted her chin so she was looking at her.

Olivia thought for a moment and said "she is named after you." she looked into his eyes and then continued "when I found out I was pregnant, and alone, I needed courage, and you always gave me that. You made me happy, and her name gave me a reason to love her, and not just genes. Even when I was younger, I always wanted to name my child after someone I care the most for, and that was you."

Elliot didn't realize that he was crying until she wiped the tears away. "You named your daughter after me. Even after I left you, even after I didn't talk to you for 5 years, even after I let you down, you named her after me." He was surprised, happy, but surprised.

"You are still my family, even if I wasn't yours." Olivia said as she was being pulled back against Elliot's chest into another large embrace.


	6. Chapter 5

_**AGES:**_

_**Maureen: 19**_

_**Kathleen: 16**_

_**Lizze &amp; Dickie: 12**_

_**Eli: 5**_

_**Eleanor: 3**_

_**Olivia: Unknown**_

_**Elliot: Unknown**_

**Chapter 5**

**(TIME SKIP)**

"I DON'T WANNA GO!" Eli shouted when Elliot tried to get him to let go of Olivia's leg.

"Let go of Olivia please." Elliot tried to convince his five year old son.

"Nooooooooooooo!" Eli screamed in reply.

Olivia bent down and picked up the little boy that was attached to her leg, she held him tight and whispered into his ear "if you go with your daddy now, maybe if your good and your daddy says okay, you can come back and visit another time, because I would love to have you and your siblings over again. But first you have to go with your daddy." Olivia looked at the little boy as he nodded, she went to put him down but he clung around her neck.

"I will, only if you can give me a mommy hug, because I haven't had one before, and you give them to Elli and Maureen and I would like to have one to." Eli looked up at Olivia as she looked at Elliot, Elliot nodded and Olivia just did that, she gave him a big embrace like she gives her own daughter.

Elliot looked at his son and Olivia with tears in his eyes. Olivia put Eli down and the rest of the Stabler clang gave her hugs and bid their goodbyes. Once they left Ellie ran up to Olivia and asked in the cutest voice possible "is he going to be my new daddy?"

Olivia had no clue how to answer that, she looked at her daughter for a couple seconds and said "maybe."

At 8pm later that night Olivia was trying to get her daughter into her pj's, but of course Ellie was putting up a struggle to get dressed, like always. Olivia almost caught her when there was a knock at the door. She looked at her watch and wondered _'Who would be her at this time of night?'_ She took her daughter pj's which were still in her hand and went to answer the door. Olivia opened the door a crack and saw Elliot; she opened it farther so he could get in. Elliot entered the apartment to see her in a black tank top and a pair of baggy grey sweat pants that were tucked into her socks; she had her hair in a messy bun. "Hi, watcha doing here?"

"I came to see you." Elliot said receiving an eye roll, silently telling that he just stated the obvious. Before he could continue little Ellie came running to him, when she reached him she leaped into his arms "Hey princess!" Elliot beamed at the little girl earning a giggle.

"Eleanor, it's time for bed, let's get your pj's on please." Ellie shock her head still in Elliot's arms. "Now." Ellie shock her head and pointed to Elliot. "Do you want Elliot to put you to bed?" Ellie shock her head in an up down motion, Olivia handed Elliot her hello kitty pj's and said "have fun."

Elliot emerged from the bedroom 20 minutes later and said "she is asleep." He walked over to the couch and flopped down, "3 bedtime stories, 5 forehead kisses, and 2 promises and she fell asleep. Olivia," he paused to make sure she was listening; when she was looking into his ocean blue eyes he continued "she called me daddy."

Elliot looked at Olivia prepared to get punched or slapped or even yelled at but she just whispered "after you left she asked if you were going to be her daddy." Elliot looked at her surprised, but glad she brought the topic of Eleanor's dad up.

Elliot decided to push Olivia, and find out what happened, "Who is Ellie's father anyway?"

Olivia looked down and said "you have to not blame yourself, if I tell you about Ellie's father. Please." She looked at Elliot and he nodded. "Okay," Olivia said as she mental prepared herself to bring back the thoughts of that night that Ellie was conceived.


	7. Chapter 6

_**Okay...so I'm a bad person, I have not been updationg often sorry. I have chapters done just not spellchecked and I was super busy! I will try to get another chapter up before Aug. but I probaly won't sorry. And I'm gone for most of Aug. so the next chapter might be up in Sept. Thank you for sticking with me and my bad updating skills.**_

**Chapter 6**

"Are you positive you want to know?" Olivia asked Elliot for the fifth time in the last ten minutes.

"Yes." Elliot said.

"Okay...here it goes..."

_It was a cold December night, about a year after Olivia best friend and partner for over decade shot a teenage girl and left. She didn't want a new partner, but eventually warmed up to Nick. They have been working together for just about a year when there was this horrible case, the worst they had seen in a while. "He killed and butchered this young girl." Olivia said to her partner._

_"I know, how could someone do that it to her?" Nick asked to nobody in particularly._

_Olivia shook her head and left the squad room, she left the precinct to get some air. She decided she was going to walk down to a cafe close to the precinct, she didn't notice the man that was following her._

_"Detective Benson?" The man asked, Olivia turned around and faced the man,_

_"Are you Olivia Benson?"_

_Olivia said "yes I am. Do I know you?" _

_The man shook his head no and replied "but you are going to get to know me." Olivia didn't understand wait he meant until he stuck a needle in her neck. The last thing she saw was his face, a face that she will never forgot. Then everything was black._

_Olivia woke up several hours later in a dark room, all by herself. Shortly after her eyes opened the man walked in and grabbed her by her hair and throws her on a chair that was in the middle of the room. "Hello Olivia," the man snarled her name and then spit in her face._

_Olivia stared in to his ugly, evil green eyes. "FYI your ass is going to be served on a platter when my squad finds you."_

_The man started to laugh evilly and said "bitch, they are not going to find you, your mine now."_

_Olivia didn't even flinch at his words; she has been called worse "I ain't your bitch." She tried to kick him but missed, he knocked her in the head so hard she black out._

"The rest of it is a blur, but of what the police reports said, they held me for 10 days, and raped me several times for 5 of them. My team found me shortly after that." Olivia sobbed remembering all that pain she went through, Elliot was also crying to. Elliot pulled her onto his lap and pulled her close, she snuggled into his arms and they cried together.

They stayed like that until the heard a small voice that said "mommy?"

"Yes honey? What are you doing up?" Olivia said noticing the little girl, she was trying to hide that fact that she was crying, but it didn't go unnoticed by the little girl.

Ellie ran over to her mother and climbed on her lap; she hugged her mother and asked "why are you crying?"

"Mommy just thought of something really sad. But I'm okay, are you okay?" Olivia asked her three year old girl that was already protecting others.

Ellie nodded her head and said "just had a bad dream, you and daddy died."

At that comment Olivia pulled her closer and said "that is never, going to happen okay?" Once again Ellie shock her head understanding.

Elliot pulled both the girls close to him and the all drifted to sleep, together, as a family.

_**If anyone has anyideas for this story let me know and I will try to add them in! Hope ypu had/have a good summer and HAPPY READING!**_


	8. Chapter 7

**Okay...I have good news and bad new and worse news... Good news is I HAVE A NEW CHAPTER! Bad news is my spell check is not working so I have a lot of spelling errors so bare with me, I was going to wait until it works agian, but that could be ages so i decide to roll with the mistakes! And the worse news is I currently have writers block so, this story is going to end soon :( Happy reading for now! and sorry this is a short chapter.**

**Chapter 7**

Elliot woke up and realized that the girls were still there; he smiled remembering that the little girl called him daddy, and then he remembered who Ellie's daddy was, then the pain he saw in Olivia's eyes last night. All the good thoughts were buried under the bad ones. Olivia started to stir and noticed Elliot was up, she silently questioned the expression on his face, she couldn't read it. She stared at him for a couple minutes then she saw a tear slip down his cheek, she wiped it off causing him to look at her. "What are you thinking about?" She questioned him.

Elliott signed then replied "I remembering how Ellie called me daddy, then Ellie's daddy, and how much pain that caused you tell me the truth."

She looked at him and then snuggled back into his chest, Olivia mumbled "it's not your fault." Then sleep became her once again.

"MOOMMY! DADDY! Wakey wakey!" Ellie said as she shook Olivia and Elliot.

Elliot woke up, but Olivia didn't. "What's up sweetie?" Elliot asked the little girl as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.

"It's time to wake up. MOMMY!" Ellie screamed before Elliot shushed her.

"Let's make mommy some breakfast, okay?" Elliot whispered to the little girl. She shook her head indicating that she wanted to. "Let's go." Elliot wiggled out from underneath of Olivia, trying not to wake her up. He did that successfully. Elliot entered the kitchen with the little girl. "What do you want to make for her?" Elliot asked the younger girl.

"Pancakes!" Mommy loves pancakes!" Eleanor said in a loud whisper.

Elliot picked up the little girl and placed her on the kitchen counter, then Elliot raided Olivia's kitchen trying to find the supplies that they need to make Olivia breakfast.

Olivia eyes fluttered open to the smell of coffee, bacon and pancakes. She heard laughing coming from the kitchen, she got off the couch and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. She entered the kitchen to see Elliot and Eleanor dancing around making breakfast, they didn't notice Olivia, so they didn't notice when she grabbed her camera from the table and snapped a few photos, after that she announced her presences. "What did you guys do my kitchen?"

Eleanor laughed and said "we made mommy breakfast!"

Olivia couldn't help but smile, she sat the table and Elliot brought over a plate and a coffee mug "you breakfast Madame." He said with a smirk covering his face. Eleanor sat down next to Olivia and Elliot brought her breakfast and a small sippy cup of apple juice and then her brought his breakfast over and sat down on the other side of Olivia.

The breakfast was silent until Elliot said "the last time I cooked in your house I had to go out and buy food cause all you had in your kitchen was water, beer and cereal." Elliot laughed and so did Olivia has she playfully slapped him in the arm.

"Well I never really was home nor did I have time or the need to cook, because you always did it." Olivia laughed and collect the dishes and placed them in the dish washer with other dishes the used the morning. She didn't realize that Elliot got up with her, she turned around after closing they dish washer; she jumped a little and said "you scared me El."

He didn't move, he just kept staring into her eyes. "Ellie, do you think mommy deserves a tickle?" Olivia's eyes got wide and Elliot got a smile on his face.

"YAY!" Eleanor squealed and Elliot started tickling her. Olivia was laughing, Elliot was laughing and Ellie was laughing so hard she was crying. They were on the floor still laughing like a family.


	9. Chapter 8

**I'm back with an update!**

**My computer is still being a bit of a diva, so until its diva moments are done or I got off my but and actually find a better way.**

**But you guys didnt get to mad at me for my spelling last chapter so here I am with another worrible not edited chapter! **

**ENJOY!**

**Love always,**

** Chelsea **

**Chapter 8**

**(time skip)**

Olivia was sitting in her office making a plan for the class she had later. But her mind couldnt focus because all she could think about was Elliot, it's been two weeks since she last saw him, _'did I scare him with my story?'_ she thought to her self.

She didnt hear the knock on the door, nor the opening of it. "Hey, am I bothering you?" Elliot askes as he enteres her office.

Olivia snapped out of her thoughts and looked at him. "No. Whats up, you look like you have something on your mind."

"I do." He looked at her and mentally built up the courage to ask her "would...would you like to...ummmm...go on a date with me, tommower." He let out a nerves laugh, the last timed he asked someone on a date was Kathy, in highschool.

Olivia laughed a little and said "yes, ill call mureen to watch the kids. One more thing Stabler, you look cute when your nervous." She got up and approched him and placed a gentle kiss on his lips. "I have to get back to work, but please come over tonight El, I need to tell you one moree thing about Ellies father."

Elliot looked up at him and said "Ill bring the chiense." Then left the room. Olivia went back to her desk and wondered how he was going to take this news.

The rest of the day passed by quickly and efore she knew it she was off to herhouse to see her wonderful child and her boyfreind. _'boyfreind' _ to her that was a werid name to call Elliot, on many occasions they had played husband and wife, engaged or dating, but this, this was real. He was her knight in shining armer that saved her from almost everything, durning this he got a few dents, but still manged to save her. He was her life, and she was his, besides the kids.

Olivia got home at about 6pm that evening, she expected that Mureen would still be there and that she would have a couple minutes to chanfge out of her work clothes. She approched her door and unlocked it, then entered her house to see Eleanor and Elliot, the two loves in her life laughing and having fun. Olivia couldnt help but imagine if Elliot was Ellies father.

Elliot and Ellie didnt nitice that Olivia came home until Elllie caught a glimpse of her in her eye."MOOMMY!" She scremed as she bolted toward her mother.

"Hey baby!" Olivia picked up the girl that just attacked ehr knees and kissed her check "how was your day?"

Ellie smiled and said "better then yours!" Elliot couldnt help but smile on the scene that was going on befor him.

"And how would you know?" Olivia askwed her daughter that was becoming a mini version of her, she had the smirk, the bravness, the need to help others and her sassyness.

"Because you sat in an office all day and learned how to do a roll!"

Olivia looked at her daughter questionaly and said "care to show me?"

Eleanor started to struggle in Olivias grasp and Olivia put her down. Eleanor bent down and did a smursalt with a giant grin on her face, she ended with her arms up and said "tada!"

"Good job! And who taught you that lil' missy?" Eleanor pointed to Elliot and Olivia smiled at him, Elliot just stood there and smiled back at her. "Who knew that Stabler was a gymnest! Go wash you hands sweetie okay?" Eleanor shook her head and Olivia playfully swatted her butt on her way put of the room.

The night went on with them eating cheinse, watching carttons and chasing Eleanor around the house trying to get her in her PJ's that she alwasy hated to put on, and to bed. Now Olivia and Elliot were sitting on the couch in slience.

Olivia finally broke the slince and said "you can not blame your self for what I am about to tell you. Okay?"

"Okay.: Is all he said

"Well, shortly after you left me brian broke up, it was a nasty breck up. He got is job and nobody heard from him for years, until there was 10 rapes and murders. We deciede to send in a undercover, which was me and Cassidy made me. I tried to leave by the back like we had planed but he caught me and kidnapped me." Olivia had tears in her eyes that she was trying to holod back becasuse she didnt want to show naymore weakness.

Elliot wrapped her up in his arms and said "can I kill him? Andwhy arent yuou still with SVU?"

Olivia giggled at the can I kill him comment, but know he was dead serious. "No, you can't kill him, I will. I quite SVU about two years ago, because with having Ellie and seeing all the kids made it harder and harder to leave my daughter, and I have a bit of PTSD and RTS but Im working through them. Cap says if I ever want to come back he will have a spot for me." Elliot just stared at her and she got nervous "El, you can leave if you want, I can take care of myself. You dont need to deal with my problems."

"I am not leaving, Im going to help you deal with your problems, okay. Please dont push me away. I just cant belive that Cassidy would do this, why. Why would he do this? What was his reasons?"

Olivia looked down and said "He thought me and you were in a realtionship, and that you transfored out to bewith me. He was jelous."She looked up agian and said "I begged for you, and you never came. I think that huirt me the most, that I know that you werent coming to save me. But, you are here now, so thats all that matters. Please dont bet your self you, this wasnt your fault."

"But I should of been there to save you." Elliot looked down and let a single tear fall onto his cheek.

Olivia wiped the tear of his cheek and lifted his head to look at her. "You can save me now, okay?"

"Okay."

After their serious talk that turned on a movie and ate the forgotten chiense on the conter.

The next day Olivia was standing in front of her mirrior looking at her dress, it was a blood red dress that stoped right above the knee, she wore black 4 inch pumps and a dimand earing, nechlace and braclet set. Her hair was down and kinda curly, because that was hjer natuiral hair. Olivia turned around to face hjer daughter that was sitting on the bed and asked "does mommy look good?"

"YAY!" The little girl squled loudly that Olivia almost didnt her trhe door.

Olivia lifts Eleanor and places her on her hip and heads to the door. She opens it to revel the Stabler clang. "Oh. My. God. Olivia you look GORGUES!" Kathleen sang. Olivia ushered the kids in.

Elliot took Eleanor and gave her to Mureen, grabbed Olivias coat and asked "need anything else?"

"Pushy tonight arent we? Oh what,thats all the time." Everyone let out a small chuckle. "Yes my purse, and I'm not weariong that coat." Elliot hangs the coat back up as Olivia grabs her black clutch purse from the kitchen counter and her knee length black dress coat from the closet. "Now I'm ready." She turns to the kids and said "there is food in the fridge if you want it, just dont eat my ice cream, all the emergicy numbers are on the fridge, and make sure the little ones go to bed at a decent time, we will try to be home before 11 and let you kjnow if we are not going to make it. Call if you need anytghing. Understand?" The kids all shake there head induicating that they understand. "Good, see you later. Be good." Elliot ushered Olivia out of the house and to his car she got in the passengers side and her got into the drivier side, oncehe was in she asked "so where are we going?"

"It's a surpise." He repiled and started the car and were off into the darkness of the nioght.


	10. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

They arrived outside a little restaurant Italian restaurant. "We are here!" Elliot said as he ushered Olivia into the restaurant The hosted greeted them and asked how many are in his party, "two, and can we have a table near the back please." Elliot replied to the kind lady.

The hosts brought them to the back and to a small table, "will this due sir?" She asked Elliot.

"Yes thank you."

"The waiter will be over with the menus in a minute, but I could hang your coats up for you if you wouldn't mind." Elliot and Olivia took off their coats and handed them to the ladies awaiting hands. She placed them on the coat rack next to their table and hurried off to help the next costumer

Shortly after she left and man dressed in a waiters uniform came to their table and handed them two menus and asked "do you now what you would like to have to drink tonight?"Elliot looked at Olivia, and Olivia chose a glass of red wine, Elliot got the same thing. The waiter hurried off to get the wine and when he came back he asked "have you decide what you would like for dinner tonight?"

"Yes, I would like to have the spaghetti please and thank you." Olivia said.

"I will also have that. Elliot said making Olivia laugh.. The waiter rushed off to the next costumer leaving them alone to talk.

"What happened to you in the last five years? We never talked and you know what happened to me, so its only fair you share too."

Elliot looked at Olivia and contemplated his answer, then answered "well, we had Kathy's funareal, it was nice. The kids hated me and everyone. I resented you. After a couple months I got a job at Queens homicide and the kids started living again. I dated a couple of women, but nothing worked out. And last year Eli asked why he didn't have a mommy, that was a hard conversation to have with your kids, let alone your 4 year old. He understood, for the most part, such as that she was dead. Near the holidays or Kathy's birthday, Lizzie insites that we set a spot for Kathy. Thats about it."

"Thats sweet. That means she is not forgotten. I have one question, when did you stop resenting me and why didn't you try to contact me?" Olivia said.

"After about two years I realized that it wasn't your fault, it was the drivers and I thought you would hate me for what I said top you. I thought we were better of apart." He looked down as he said the last bit.

Olivia took his hand a brought it to her lips and placed a gentle kiss on his knuckles and said "I could never hate you, I can only love you."


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N: Okay so we are nearing the end...****spoiler**** it is going to have a HUGE twist and I will ****explain**** that in the last chapter.**

**Chapter 10**

It's been six months since their first date, and everything was going great for them. They were making up of the lost time, they visited Kathy's grave and the Stabler children started to call her Mama Liv, and Eleanor called Elliot Daddy or Daddy El, it depended on the situation. In the six months they told Olivia's collegus and they were so happy for them. They knew this was going to happen for a long time now.

"Hey Liv," Olivia's friend Mark greeted her as she entered the staff room and headed to her usual table. "You look crappy today."

Olivia shot Mark a glare and said "way to make a woman feel good."

"Is everything alright with you and Elliot, because if he hurt you I am more then happy to kill him."

Olivia laughed at his protectiveness, "yes. No. Maybe. I don't know. He asked me to move in with him."

"And your answer was?" Mark urged her to go on.

"What is Liv answering?" Maddison, her closes friend at the acamandy said as she entered the the room and joined the conversation.

"Elliot asked me to move in." Olivia said.

"Congrats Liv!" Jake a follow teacher said joining in on the conversation to.

"No, I said no." Olivia said to her friends

"Why the hell would you do that? He is good for you. You come in to work smiling, and your happy. I know I haven't know you for that long, but Liv, I have never seen you this way." Maddison said as she placed a supporting hand on the only other female teacher in the room.

"He makes me happy, and he understands me and he is there for when the nightmares come back. Its just, all of his kids beside Maureen live at home, then bring Eleanor into the house also. Thats a three year old, a five year old, two twelve year olds and a sixteen year old under one roof with two parents. This is still new, and I don't want to screw it up, like I screw every relationship I had." Olivia signs and puts her head in her hands.

"If you have a penis please don't follow me and Liv." Maddison said as she grabbed Liv be the wrist and pulled her to the women's bathroom down the hall from the staff room. Maddison locked the door and turned to Olivia and said "thought you could use some less tosteron, now spill."

Olivia laughed and said "I told him about Cassidy. He knows all of my serects, he is the one. Elliot has been my night in shining armor for as long as I could remember I do want to move in, and we asked the kids and there okay with it, but I need my little place, so when the nightmares or flashbacks are bad and I need to break down I have somewhere to go that there is no kids, usually I would go in my room once Ellie asleep, but if I move in with Elliot we will share a room and that won't work anymore. He tries to help and he does great, it's just I'm not used to having someone there to help me calm down, I have doing it on my own, or you would help me by getting me drunk, or just sitting there and dealing with my breakdowns. After Elliot left, I only had Fin, and when you came Amanda and Nick came I didn't like that the team was changing, but then after the whole Cassidy thing, and I came here you helped me. I don't know why, but I automatically trusted you. What should I do Maddison?"

Madison looked at her for a minute and said "Liv do you love him?"

"Yes. Very much."

"Would you die for him?"

"Yes."

"Would he die for you?"

"Yes."

"Then my advsice is to move in with him, open a new chapter and do something crazy, something out of the ordinary for you. When you need a break from him, or need a breakdown, call me and come over, you are my best friend you have key to my house, anytime Liv you need a break come on down and breakdown, I'll keep some hard liqour in the cabints for those moments."

"You mean it?"

"Yes." Maddison gave her a friendly hug and said "now on a more serious note how is the sex?"

Olivia laughed and headed for the door "you will never know."and with that she left Maddison in the room and headed back to the staff room.

A couple minutesa after Maddison and Olivia sat down at their desks, a delivrey man holding a bouguet of red roses, Olivias favourites. "Ms. Benson?" The deliviry man asked.

"Right here." Olivia raised her hand and got up from the chair as the man approched her.

"This are for you." He handed her the flowers, "have a good day!" He said before he left the squad room.

"Nice Livy, those from Elliot?" Mark asked.

Olivia looked at the card and her faced drop from the smile that was on it when they guy first came in. "Ummm, no. It doesnt have a name. But it says 'watch your back your my last victom, and your mother was my first.' My father is dead, this cant be the same guy."

Mark, Maddison and Jake approached her as Olivias faced paled significantly. Maddison bent down so she was at Olivias eye level and asked "are you okay?" Olivia shook her head no. "Okay, want me to take you home?" Olivia shook her head yes. "Okay. Lets go." She helped her up and grabed her purse.

"WAIT!" Olivia shouted, "we need to call the cops." Olivia pulled out her phone adn called a number she hasnt called in years, "hi Cap, it's Liv. I have a problem, I need a CSU team down at the unviresty ASAP beacuse I just got flowers with a threat." Olivia was slient for a moment well she listened to her cap talk "yep, there is only me and three other people and ill maske sure they don't leave. Yes sir, Yes, okay thank you." She hung up the phone and sat down, she manged not to show how scared she was.


	12. Chapter 11

**A/N: Okay guys this is the final chapter...**

**Chapter 11**

It has been three days since the flowers came and none of the team let her out of their sight. They still haven't caught the man that did it, and Elliot let every wall now how pissed he was. Liv was getting annoyed with his consent yelling so she snuck out of the precinct, _'I can protect myself. I was only a cop for 12 years.' _ She thought to herself as she exited thee building. Olivia started to wonder the streets just thinking about all the good that as happened in her life in the past year.

MEANWHILE AT THE PRECINT

"Where the hell is Benson?" Cragen boomed. Nobody knows the answer and nobody dared to tell him. "I said where she is!" He yelled again.

This time Fin answered, "She snuck out on us. She doesn't have her phone, or it is off. Cap, we have no clue where she is."

"Find her! And Elliot!" Cragen slammed the door to his office.

BACK TO LIV

Olivia hasn't noticed the man following her for the last block, she was to busy daydreaming until the man spoke to her "Livvy, why must you not notice me. That is not a nice way to treat your father." His slimy voice made Olivia shudder and turn around just to see a gun pointed at her.

"Why are you here? Why now? What are you going to do?" Olivia painkley questioned him.

"Answer to the first question, I'm here to kill you. Second question, your life just became happy, and third question, I'm going to kill you."

Before Olivia could say anything the gun went off and hit her square in the heart, and she slowly bled to death, and her 'father' shot himself in the head and his dead body fell on top of her.

A/N: I feel like I crushed your guys dreams and i'm sorry. I had so much fun writing this, and I'm sorry about the ending, I had other plans for this but I got writers block on how to get there. I was very busy, and I wasn't updating very often, and I'm sorry for that. But this will not be the last of me, I have been writing what was suppose to be a one-shot, but now is 16 notebook pages long, and I'm still going! So please don't hunt me down and kill me, I just needed a fast ending and this is where I got to. I hoped you liked this story overall and happy reading! With endings comes a new beginning.


	13. epilogue (chapter 12)

**Okay guys you asked and I give….**

**Chapter 12**

It's been six years since Olivia died. Elliot broke for a while but when he got her will he found out that he would have custody of all his children including Ellie.

"Daddy?" nine year old Ellie asked.

"Yeah baby?" Elliot said from the kitchen table.

"Can we go visit mommy today please? And can maybe we all go?" Ellies asked shyly.

"Ill call and ask how about we go in about an hour okay?"

"Okay."

There was only two kids living in the house now, Eli was eleven and was a bundle of energy, and Ellie. She was still shy and she wasn't very social, she is seeing a therapist. The twins, Kathleen are in university and Maureen now has a family of her own.

Everyone is now gathered at the graveyard remembering everything about Olivia, including her funeral.

_**FLASHBACK**_

_It was the stereo typical whether for a funeral; it was like the sky was also mourning for the loss of another extraordinary human being. The funeral was for a fallen police officer, even know she wasn't one anymore she was still procteing her family. The funeral was a blur for everyone, there was a lot of tears. Ellie became anti social and clung to Elliot worse then his soaked suit._

"_Daddy? Where is moommy?" Ellie asked._

_She was asked this everyday since they found out and it killed him. "Baby, mommy went up to heaven to be with her mom." Elliot said trying not to cry._

_The few months after the funeral was a blur for everyone._

_**END OF FALSHBACK**_

"Elliot remembers the time when you first met Liv?" Cragen asked

"Yeah. I actually didn't like her when she first came in. But then she gave me some sassiness, and I could tell we were going to be best friends." Elliot said.

"My favorite memory of mommy is the day before I met you. We went to the park and played on the swings then she helped me make cookies for my preschool. We got so messy and that's why she was chasing me with my pants." Ellie laughed, "I miss her." She whispered.

"My favorite memory of Olivia is when she first told me she loved you. We were at the bar, drunk, and playing truth or dare. We did some pretty scandalous stuff that I can't talk about in front of children." Everyone laughed.

"How about we go to my house and watch Dirty Dancing, one of Liv all time favorite movie and eat Chinese take out?" Elliot offered. Everyone said yes and they set off.

No of them ever forgot Olivia Benson, the friend, the daughter, the mother, the sister and the lover, and the will never forgot just how amazing she was.

**A/N: okay guys, this is the end…for real this time. And just so you know there is another story coming up soon, its going to be a series of short ones for the time being until I decide what to write next. I hope this fulfilled your hopes! Keep reading, and Live, Love, Read! (Ps: if the every kill Olivia off in the show I might die!)**


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